Goose

What did the goose say to the aardvark?
Damn You, why can't my name be first in the alphabet, At this rate I'll never get to see britney Spears.

Laugh

What did the man say when he laughed at Kane's Blog?
Oh my god what have I done, what will the kids think, Life is just not worth it anymore, goodbye world. meow

Kitten

What did the dog's wife say when it gave birth to kittens?
I thought that threesome might come back to haunt me.

Sausage

What did the sausage say to the egg?
Is it tuesday?

Fish

How do you stop a fish from smelling?
stomp on it's head

Ugly

Is it just me or is this chick ultra sexy? leave a comment

tree

What did the tree say to the koala?
Oh, yeah baby, yeah, yeah, do it, pick my leaves baby.

grandma

What did the man say to the dog after it peed on his leg?
Oh great, now how am I meant to get with my grandma?

Toilet

What did the toilet say to the man?
Please dont poo in my mouth

Mary

To the tune of the song that the snotty nosed kids sing in Mary Poppins when they decide they want a whench instead of a nanny.

For all the girlfriends of the world from all the boyfriends of the world.

If you wish to be my Mrs,
Be a dear and do the dishes.
Make sure all the cleanings done,
don't forget to wipe your bum.

Always clean up after sex,
Fend off the Tyranno Rex.
Buy me stuff that I don't need,
Don't forget, prepare my feed.

A girlfriend is one who does what's said,
Not a girl who will think, or argue in bed.

Hurry up prepare his dinner,
If not my advice is Bin her.

LEAVE A COMMENT

IF YOU GOT HERE BY MISTAKE THEN LEAVE A COMMENT, WIERDO, IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW THEN THROW SOMETHING AT YOUR SCREEN. PREFERABLY A SMALL CHILD.

Car

What did the man say when he was wakling down the street one day and all of a sudden was hit by a bus then was taken to hospital and all of a sudden his legs had to be cut off because they had been crushed by a airplane?
Ouch

John

There is this guy in my class whose picture is under good comment. Now that you all know who he is, picture him naked with breasts.

King Kong (this one's a favourite)

If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play Ping Pong, and died there, what would they put on his coffin?
a lid

John Howard

Is John Howard Sexy?
leave a comment and tell me what you think.....

Fruit cake

Juicy Fruit Cake

Fruitcake Recipe

A cup water, I cup sugar, 4 large eggs, 2 cups dried fruit, 1 teaspoon baking soda, 1 teaspoon salt, 1 cup brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts, 1 gallon whisky;

Sample the whisky to check to quality. Take a large bowl.

Check the whisky again to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour 1 level cup and drink. Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer; beat 1 cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again. Make sure the whisky is still ok.

Try another tup. Turn off mixer. Break 2 legs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup and dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck on the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift one cup of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one tablespoon of sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven.

Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the whisky again.

Go to bed

Who the hell likes fruitcake anyway?

Mouse

What did the mouse say after it ran all around Australia?
I'm tired

Go to Cameron's blog

At http://thedangermouse.blogspot.com

Do you think Kev and Karman should get together

Go to http://kevandkarman.blogspot.com

Good Comment

This is the type of person that visits my blog.

I'm not too sure, but I managed to lose half a bottle of coke today :(Speaking of which! Did you know that it's hot! TOOOO HOT! Make it cooler. Now. Please...? If you don't... I'll throw my whi... hang on! WHERE ARE MY WHITE SOCKS, MEAN HEADS!? I know you stole them.. Give them back. Now.

Leave comments like that

Sunglasses

What did the sunglass say to the head?
Look, Look, It's a poodle

roads

How many roads must a man walk down?
23

Man

What did the man say when someone gave him herpes?
Thankyou

Visit Kev's Blog

http://fttdic.blogspot.com

Poo Bum

What do you do if you want a feeding of toasted cheese sandwiches?
Think like Poo Bum, Hook up with your grandma.

Car

If was to waste an hour in my car whilst looking for my latest pair of pants dippid in blue and red dye, what would I be doing?
I would be wasting an hour in my car whilst looking for my latest pair of pants dippid in blue and red dye

Ciggarette

What happens when a duck asks for a ciggerette?
He either gets refused or gets given a smoke.

Pig

Ho do you keep a pig clean?
Clean it regularly

Fun things to do Whilst naked

• Go swimming with your mum
• Eat a hamburger
• View bad blogs (admit if you are naked right now!!!)
• Drop something down a hole
• Deep sea fishing
• Ice Skating
• Pick on Shelies
• Pretend you are clothed, then go to the old folks home.

Bar

A guy walks into a bar, sits down with his friends and starts to share stories. At one point he looks up and says wow, i am so happy to be in a bar with my friends sharing stories.

Lightbulbs

How many Shelies Does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It never happens cause they are to busy laughing at Kane's jokes!

Fish

What did the fish say to the other fish?
Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot...Shit, I forgot...Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot...Shit, I forgot...Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Shit, I forgot... Oh Yeah, I'm hungry.

Barn

What did the Barn say to the house?
If I had a Penis i'd have sex with you.

For TPC Lithgow Students

What did Sarah say when she realised that john was looking at bad blogs instead of doing his work?

JOHN! Do your work or i'll be sleeping at your place.

Dog

What did the Dog say when it saw a cat?

Woof

Sand

Two grains of sand were walking together in the desert. Suddenly, one turned to the other and said, "Dude, I think we're being followed."

Paint

Why do pick up lines always fail?

Because the women you try them on arn't Hookers!

Sheep

What did the man say to the sheep that was on his roof?

Get down.

Fish

How do you catch a fish?

Get someone to throw it to you.

Farmer

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
Where's my tractor